How to Build Willpower

Something most people, especially in the United States, struggle with is willpower.  More specifically, people struggle with the lack of willpower.  Men are no exception to this problem.  With today's society built around instant gratification, it is a constant battle for any man to keep his primitive "caveman self" in control.  What most men do not realize, however, is that willpower isn't a have or have not.  Willpower is just like physical strength; one must work hard to develop and continue working to maintain it.  Building willpower, self control, and self discipline are critical to becoming the most effective, most successful man possible.

One of the most useful books on this topic I have found is The Willpower Instinct: How Self-Control Works, Why It Matters, and What You Can Do To Get More of It by Kelly McGonigal.  In this book, she discusses numerous factors contributing to an individual's willpower reserves (or lack thereof).   Here are some of the critical steps to building willpower like you've never known covered in her book.

Meditate 

Meditation is one of the best ways to start building more willpower immediately.  Studies have shown that regular meditation has helped people reduce stress, lose weight, stop smoking, and overcome numerous other popular willpower challenges.  A simple meditation, such as a breathing exercise where you focus on the inhale and exhale of each breath, trains your brain to focus and push out other thoughts.  Drifting from the thought of the breath followed by returning to the thought of the breath exercises your prefrontal cortex, the region of the brain that controls willpower.  Five minutes of meditation a few times a week will yield increased willpower almost immediately, with the results compounding over time.  Extending the meditation duration and frequency will simply yield better and faster results.

Get Some Sleep

The body uses energy for all of its daily tasks, both physical and mental.  The energy used to lift a book is the same energy needed to make the decision to get off the couch and exercise.  Sleep deprivation, even on a small scale (regularly less than 7 hours of sleep per night), impairs the body's process of absorbing glucose, it's primary energy source.  When you feel groggy and weak after a inadequate night's sleep, your willpower muscle is in the same state.  Therefore it is important for anyone fighting a willpower challenge to regularly get a good night's rest.  The good part is that a single good night of sleep is usually enough to restore a person's willpower reserves and get the body functioning normally. All that said, avoid depending on the weekend to catch up on your sleep or you'll find yourself exercising on Monday and eating cheesecake on Friday.

Fuel Your Brain

Although sugar does provide the body short term energy boosts, do not mistake sugar to be the answer to your willpower dilemma.  Swings in blood sugar levels over the long haul actually affect your body's  ability to utilize sugar effectively.  This results in a higher blood sugar level and no efficient way to use it, resulting in less energy and less willpower.  Unlike sleep, however, the solution to this is not a quick weekend fix.  Fueling your body with natural, non-processed foods like nuts, fruits, vegetables, and lean proteins is the best way to keep your body in prime, good-decision-making condition.  If it looks like you just cut it off the animal or picked it off the bush, it's probably a good food choice.

Pick a Challenge, and Be Specific

For your willpower battles ahead, avoid taking on too much at once.  Small victories are much better than major losses and no progress.  Pick something you struggle with daily, and make it something very specific.  For instance, try "I want to smoke 5 fewer cigarettes every day" instead of "I want to quit smoking forever".  Use small steps like these to make progress toward your larger goals.  Your brain processes small victories the same way as large ones as long as you specifically pick them in that manner.  An effective way to capture these "steps" is to write it down, either in a journal or on a white board.  Mark off your victories as they are achieved to activate the reward center of the brain and get the extra mental boost to keep working hard.

It is also important to avoid tackling too many challenges at once.  Tackling 3 or 4 major willpower challenges will have the same effect as trying to stop smoking all at once.  Your brain will be overloaded, and you will find yourself searching for "How to Build Willpower" again.  As you conquer your first challenge or two, you will have built more willpower and will be better equipped to take on subsequent challenges.

I encourage you to give the book mentioned earlier in the post a read.  Dr. McGonigal does a great job explaining exactly what willpower is and why we so often succumb to those challenges in today's society.  The book helps put your specific challenges in perspective and allows you to take a new approach at conquering what you thought could never be won.

As you work to build and improve your willpower, remember that everyone is capable of exhibiting great willpower, but it has to be developed before it is used.  You must exercise your brain to prepare for the big challenges ahead, whether that is resisting the flirtatious coworker, hitting the gym before work, or paying off your debt instead of buying that new toy.  Self discipline is the product of strong willpower, and a successful man always exhibits self discipline in the face of life's challenges.  Control your life; don't let it control you.